Reflections 

 

from Angie Elliott

 

My Brother Waz.

  

My brother Waz once said to me ď  I donít mean to hurt your feelings but donít always think of things just being about you, look at the bigger picture.Ē  I think that has always been his strength, and in fact my weakness. When we were little he was always full of energy. He was forever on the go always trying to stir someone in a gentle sort of way. As we shared our childhood together that often meant that we were the brunt of his jokes! But behind all the jokes we always knew there was a heart of gold. A heart that enabled him to see the big picture.

As kids you never take time to stop and realize how lucky you are. Then you become independent adults, move out and maybe even marry and have kids. There still isnít time to stop and reflect on things. Of course, during all this time the jokes never stop and the one about someone using a crane to steal the roof off the house he was building for mum and dad will always go down as one of his best.

And then one day you suddenly stop and take check of your life. You realize your kid brother has turned into an amazing guy who is wiser than you in so many ways. He is in fact someone to look up to and feel proud of and indeed you take a moment to feel grateful that he is part of your life. You feel so content to know that he plays such an important part in your kids lives and your own. You look forward to the nights when he and Elana would end their walk at your house and stop in for a beer or coffee and a chat. 

And then comes the night when they pick you and your kids up to take you with them to a family friendís 21st. Upon return from the party as he carries the kids to bed and checks that the house is safe you look at him for the first time as your elder brother who is there to look after you when your husband and parents are absent. Not knowing that this will be the last time to speak to him. I guess this is something we all understand too clearly, there was no chance to tell him all Iíd learned about him over the years or about how honoured I felt to be his sister. No chance to give him the birthday card that said it all.

Despite all the emptiness that came into our lives so quickly, despite the change in all the things that were to be, he is still with us all.  And once more we can take a moment out of our sadness to feel proud that we were privileged to have had him in our lives and to have him still with us in our hearts. Although he doesnít walk along side of us, my brother Waz, the one who had a zest for life and a heart big enough for everyoneís troubles and thoughts walks through our lives with us each and every day and gives us the strength we need to strive to be as wonderful as he

 

I love you always Waz

Angie